I am bored of Blogdrive, I am moving to Livejournal.

http://meinarse.livejournal.com/

Why? No reason.

The weather has been nice recently... too nice. I suspect a horrible cold snap is on its way, like that sucky April ice storm we had once. Spring never comes in smoothly and gracefully, it has to stall and screech and jerk its way in like a dying manual transmission.

*shifty eyes* And that's not a slight on someone's driving skills. Just an appropriate metaphor, I swear.

It's weird, yesterday was the last day of classes, for this entire year, and it doesn't quite feel like it. I guess once my last exam is done I'll feel more free.

After about 8 months of living on campus, I have finally discovered the billions of hiking trails that start just behind the residence buildings.

I am an idiot. They're beautiful. Almost makes me want to come back here next year. Though I suppose that the Mac area of Hamilton isn't so bad. Downtown is scary. So so scary. Worse than Toronto, because the homeless crazy people outnumber the regular people by like 2:1. *shudder*

Take the Lead comes out this Friday.

I <3 Antonio Banderas.

The movie will probably be terrible, he apparently does better broadway and Spanish-language films but I do not care.

There is Antonio, and ballroom dancing. I am powerless.

Soon, open season for students begins...

Yup. Exams.

The studying began Friday, but I really should have started earlier. Dammit. I do this every single time. I always think a week will be more than enough, but it never ends up being enough when I divide the number of units I need to cover by the number of days I have.

This week I need to do 3 units of Enviro and 2 units of Bio every single day. Then I have a full week each for Physics and Chem by themselves, which is good. I am retaining my 57% in physics, thank god. All I need to do is get a pass on the exam and I'm fine.

Looking back on the year though... I can't say that I hate school entirely. I can see myself doing this for a couple more years, though the more unstructured  and self-directed learning (i.e. thesis projects) of the upper years scares the shit out of me. I can even see myself going back for either a second, proffesional, or post-grad degree. Student for life. Environmental Law tempts me because of its neediness and my liking of such things. I had considered law until I realized that I didn't have a personality for the courtroom: I burst into tears far too easily to be a lawyer. With enviro law I'd just be a 'consultant'. Once again, I have no idea what I want to do. I didn't think I could get so far without knowing--I always thought I had my future down, but apparantly even getting a degree doesn't tell me what the hell I'm going to do when I graduate. I suppose it's exciting, not knowing. I am confident that my life can't go to crap--it would take a serious breakdown of my entire support system/nation to do that. I will graduate, will get a job *somewhere*, even if its crappy, I'll never be dirt poor, even if it means having to move back home for a bit to save enough money for a downpayment of some sort. I will travel, somehow. I think I'm confident that I won't end up on the streets someday, a crackwhore or something.

And if everything goes to crap despite this, I'll go swim over to Scotland and shack up with Denise until I'm too wrinkly to move.

The toga party this friday was... replete with togas. I hadn't expected everyone to actually show up and stay in the togas for the night. Engineers. Oi. I also got thrown out of a bar/club for the first time in my life that night, wheee! Marta gave me her drink to hold while she danced, and I got caught with it and ushered out. Then had to bus it home in a toga in the rain. Fuuun. Homeless people jeered at us. Creepy. I hate Hamilton. I can't decide if I hate Georgetown more or less than I hate Hamilton. Both are equally poor, seedy, and closed on Sundays. I much prefer the 'saug, even if it is deathly boring and impossible to navigate without a car.

Has anyone attempted the G2 exit test yet? I think I will be trying for my G this summer, since I will be getting lots of highway driving experience twice a day this summer. I'm a hesitant and nervous driver, but not necessarily *bad* or dangerous. I don't think.

Adorable Steve Maddens that don't come any smaller than a 6 are the suck.

$5 bright-green heels in my teeny size are happiness.

So, in Tali-land, I bought an eyelash curler. I couldn't resist, they're so funny looking.

A small part of me, despite seeing them everywhere, on TV, in stores etc etc, refused to believe that something that funny looking actually worked. Surprisingly, it does.

So now I have curly eyelashes.

Weird.

In non-boring news... there is none. Life is calm and sedate and involves having TV time. Is good. Boredom is better than stress. I even have time to go sexy-jeans pants shopping this Wednesday, and perhaps fabric shopping as well.

I think I'm going to an engineer toga party this Friday. After I come back from a 5-hour volunteering stint in a thunderstorm on a small island in Hamilton Harbour with one of my bio profs. And like an idiot, I didn't bring my slush-pants from home. Brilliant. Trudging in bird poo on rocks in a thunderstorm in soggy cotton.

Does one actually wear a toga at a toga party? Why do toga parties exist? Why am I going to one? What do you wear under a toga? Mysteries, mysteries.

Woo, Arrogant Worms this Saturday! I will resist and not buy a Worm toque, for they are gimpy looking, if fun. Instead, I will look for season-appropriate Worm-wear. I promise.

My week-thing of death is almost over. With just one more midterm and a formal lab report to do/hand in for tomorrow, I'm almost done this hell. From here on out, it will be a nice, manageable workload. Just regular classes, regular studying, regular random assignments. Thank God. I can actually go to the gym and have a decent workout. Maybe even borrow my roomie's Pilates tape and do some stretching. Make friends with my yoga ball once more, and in the process, make enemies with my knees. And if I'm very very lucky, manage to get a tape of "What Not to Underwear" and watch people with no taste get yelled at. So satisfying.

School is being okay once more. I resent the fact that it has eaten a large chunk of my life and concerns, but I can live with that. I am zen. I even suspect that when it comes time to graduate, I may be sad to leave, and consider going back for more education.

I have completely lost interest in books lately though. I keep picking up books that I remember were good, and finding them to be utter crap. Any suggestions? Anything, be it good brain-esploding literature, or light fluffy fantasy. I need to get back in the groove. I miss reading good books. Keyword being 'good'.

Why is it that I'm always torn between studying what I know will get me a job somewhere, and what I really really want to study? I just can't get a break, can I? At least this time, it's all within the same faculty, so it's not too bad. Labwork, or fieldwork? Labwork or fieldwork? Fieldwork would be so satisfying now, but I can imagine that as I got older, it wouldn't be so fun anymore. I'd want a more stable, sitting down sort of job. But what's the point of being young if all you do is plan for when you're old and won't enjoy things anymore?

I think I will just do what I want, damn the world.

I'm going to do an exchange in third year, even if it costs me another year of school. I want to live in Europe.

I'm going to take field courses next year and every year after, even if it costs me thousands and all my spring breaks until I graduate. I want to see the jungles.

I am going to graduate with a specialization in Biodiversity. Screw you, world. If it all goes to crap, then I'll just be a student forever, and get a more useful degree later.

I'm going to work my ass off for a summer, and possibly get a weekend job, so I can go backpacking and travel and not give a damn about anything.

It feels good to say that.

Today's cheapo outfit:

bra = la senza = $10
underwear = joe boxer = $5
courderoy pant = bongo = $15
red tank top = unknown = $3
cream shrug = dahlia = $17
socks = costco = $2
shoes = unknown = free/gift
necklace = dynamite = $10

Ooooh yes, a whopping $62 for an outfit I could easily wear to work. I need more of these cheapo outfits.

I once again procrastinate, but this time, I'm studying for biology.